Miles and miles of perfect skin I swear I do I fit right in…

-Hole.

Becomming Godsize. -Pantera.

They will say you are on the wrong road if it is your own.
-Antonio Porchia.

I cant shut my brain up and the house is empty so I am gonna spew out my life onto the tiny screen once again.Cause I can.Its fuckin sweet knowing that there is some liberty left dont you think?…I adore the people who cant take the threat of me…I love your insults and all the energy that you put into me …I distill your essence and use it back agaist you…I am gonna be the last thing you see…

[your scars make you bigger than the sum of what you were when you were born and that is an act of greatness…I swing by your greatness…And you are great…never forget how great you are….]

Shame that you dont have the balls to ever say it to my face….

That wold be the rock solid reason that I need to train every day….you are so weak and I adore you…hear me!….ADORE you for it you simpering little purist fucks…Muah! Muah! Muah!

Just called Sach who is driving round in circles at LAX [fun fun fun!] waiting for my sister to get off the plane…so I guess I will be seeing them both soon…she has the unique talent of treating everyone like shit and yet they still do her bidding…remind me to master that crafty little trick in my next life.

Trying to pack ten months of shit into 2 hat boxes and a vietnam issue backback is totally headache inducing…I just thought that science would have carried us further by now ya know? Where is my silver suit and my meal in a pill???I think that you should be able to shrink your clothes or somthing…that, and maggie the dog has hidden one of my only shoes.I have 2 pairs here in LA as I left my combats in Calgary…Ross reasures me that they will be reunited with me in Sydney at some stage…I got those fuckers second hand in the summer of 97′ in fitzroy and they were already fucked then so I have a bit of an attachment to their smelly selves.

Delux handed me a ziplock bag on the sly the other day that filled me with glee…No ,not fuckin mushrooms you deviants!…he had hacked out 3 of his dreads so I sewed them all together and much to his disgust and amazement they are now living on my head.Makes me feel closer to him…chuckle….

I have been home alone all day and having very strange dreams when Scotty called me with a monster hangover from practice…told him that it served him right! I doubt that J even remembers his drunken dialing antics…ya get that on the big jobs…

You know,I dont even know who in my band is making the mega treck thrugh Europe [cue cheezy synth line] with me…Ross is outta credit on his phone and cant call…the shiteful thing about having a cell phone here is that you pay when people call you!! A dirty fuckin scam indeed…

As always,I am telling you guys what the deal is while leaving the people closest to me completely in the dark.I dont know why I do that…I view myself small here…its only the way to fly…..There is that perverse kinda feeling that they will scratch their heads and go “I had no idea!”

[I asked her how he was in light of his jail time…she flicked her hip and said “He had skychanel! He had play station!!!!” I wonder why I even bothered asking…nothing really means shit to anyone I deal with…no one cares…the first truth of always…..]

Did I ever tell you how much I hated my last dentist in Newtown? Rip off merchant supreme? Well she is gonna be getting a vist from my angry ass when I get back…all the work she did,much like Elvis,has left the fuckin building….

Cunts….

BAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!

Eye hate God and COC are both on tour right now and I am broke so as you can imagine I view it all as rather cruel at the moment.

Ok I am over that now….Dunno what is gonna happen next or where I am gonna end up…I just know that in my imagination it is like a louder version of Kill bill 2 and that makes me one happy little fucker…I have to admit that I am looking foward to snubbing my nose at what ever winter has to offer in any other part of the world after being the vet of the frozen fucking north….speaking of which…Ryan SF wrote me from Calgary telling me all the news [Sorry I have not got back to ya yet bro…my hotmail is fucked…] and during the course of all the gossip he tells me that my ex amour wants to write to me now???Huh???What a fuckin pillock! Yeah,wants to talk to me now that I am to far away to roll through and beat the hide off him…let all take a moment to look at that last sentence and reflect WHY it is that I cannot sustain a fucking relationship shall we???….ok! Thats enough! eyes to the front…..

All dodgy road capers of the sexual kind have been rather how shall I put it?…meh?…Yep that will do….No wonder I never fuck other musicains cause if they feel the way that I do we are all up shit creek.Its pretty unsound to finger fuck young lasses and let young lads do you all cause you are somewhat bored?….I think all except Mikey have been banged on this trip and the general consenus goes back to….you got it….meh.

I wrote to PC the other day wishing him and the lads a good tour through Europe and to ask if we can hook up for some shows with them later in the year which I am hell keen for.

We are upping it a notch live and I want nothing but hate faces in the pit.I am so fucking fed up right now that by the time I hit the stage I just want to explode…Been listening to a killer grind band from Portland called Fornicator so that all goes into the mix,they fuckin rule.I guess that its my not so private desire that people continue to underestimate what I am doing and what we are as a band cause my victories taste all that much sweeter when I dip them in the blood of doubters….

I wish that I knew how type….. this shit drives me mental….I keep painting my stumpy nails black with 3’s nail polish..they look like crap…I like it….

I think that my friend quota is spent and has expired.Thats why all this net malarky is good for me…its the arms distance thing that does me so many favors compared to the daily fuck ups and overs the I find myself trying to navigate…yadda yadda….

I love it when I get fowarded negitive stuff…reminds me to keep going if for nothing else that to piss on the faggots who dont have the balls to live it…..

FUCK! It has put me in such a good mood!

I know that I have to pull my head from my butt and re-enter the dragon so to speak in Hollywood tommrow night…people have really low expectations here which is good for me at this point in my life because I get to roll through like a ghost…. I have been tinking about y’all alot of late and I applaud and thank you for standin by Me/us as a band cause I know the shit that we cause…all those fuckin “individuals” out there [cough!] who are pure metalheads [oh my sides!] The way I see it is that you roll by my side and for what its worth I have your back and you mine…I would rather this that a bunch of gauntlet wearing pussies who spend all their time trying to be clever on forums….. The fact that we have to defend ourselves is proof that we disturb and that is its own reward….

I still wanna go and see SYL at the house of blues…hope that it all pans out….I need some heavy pit action so that I can fall on the plane all beaten….coollllll…!!!!!!
I love that 3 years later it still bugs people that we are such good mates with those guys and that they continue to support us and we them every chance we get.

hardy fuckin ha…..

So,To those of you in LA I will see you at the Cat Club on tuesday and to all back home I will see you on the road in August..

My sister just barged in the front door all whirlwind with travel and tales so I guess that I will be privy to tales…she just walked out the door again so that means she is off to score…I know…I question what I am doing here every fucking day….I will be clear of the greif that my love has brought before you can say……….

“Grammy for best new hard rock /metal artist goes to….”

You dont like it or Me? Tell it to the judge motherfuckers!

SF4L
Michele.