Sydney.So hard to be a fighter when your hands are always tied.

-C.O.C

Turn out the lights, tell me a story. -The Music.

[…….leefish is alive and I miss him.Jr is running around nude on top of ruins in Peru,Blackie is touring his ass off, Miss lili white tiger got the job, we leave in 9 weeks, we are showcasing at the troubadour,this diet sucks, love hangin with y’all in the carpark at the all ages, Calgary again eh?,Roadtrip to saint Tina’s, one more clip before we go, nothings ever good enough,5 months apart and I am sleepless, your needle in my skin and I am yours, Family that I don’t know showing up when I play why?, Monkey never calls less she needs magic and it don’t hurt no more, Album cover looks great, miss M fits under my arm, want to peel myself, Know what y’all say and you cant meet my eyes……]

-Real late on the back of a flyer late night.

Miss Annie tells me that “White trash has just been sitting there so I don’t know what you are up to….”

Well, that makes two of us.

I have been writing ’em but my computer is a bit weird [We belong together] so I have not been able to send them to Delux.As soon as I work it out I will flood it all over again.

Cold as a hookers snatch today and I hate it. In the spirit of all that is Chuck Norris I spent 20 buck on his Total trainer at the yard sale that the 2 Mexican guys across the road were having. It all looks rather dangerous and my intentions are pure so that will keep me out of trouble.Heh.

Went postering last nite with Miss terror. Got home a 2 in the morn and proceeded to re read Jenna Jameson’s book till 7 and was overcome by a nihilistic black cloud that had me having weird dreams bout singing in a church and yelling at Jessica Simpson. The mind boggles. My mind is overloaded.

I love Jenna so this is great….read on…..

We have the design for the new tee shirt and it is gold. One of my spies [“Fly! Fly my children of the night!”] sent me a thing that some net monkey had written, brace yourself.

“Tourettes suck more cock than Jenna Jamerson”

Now if that was not made to be printed in 4 inch letters on a black tee shirt I dunno what was.

Thanks to the shit for brains that coined it. In Honor of you and all your coward like brethren I am not only playing Waken but the Monsters Of Rock in Bulgaria.

bye bye suckers….
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

So, What has been happening. I will try and remember…….

Tour…..

In a scant 9 weeks we will be on the bird once again to search and destroy all the way around the globe. Anyone who wants to give us money is welcome. First stop makes it all pretty sexy. Out to LA for a month solid to record the next album. It will be summer there so in between surfing, yoga with Ross and singing I don’t think that life is to stinky at this juncture.

Recording…..

As we speak really. I have been over at Manning’s place 2 days a week scaring the crap out of the neighbors.Ross gets me at 12 and picks me up at 6.Been at it bout 3 weeks and I think that we have 9 completed but I wouldn’t know as he spent all his money on tattoos and didn’t burn me a disc.Dick.

Shows…….

2 left before we leave the country. The Come together fest at Luna Park and then the farewell show at Club77 on June 17th.Tom and cris have booked Luke My fave DJ so I can rock out to Slayer all nite. cool.

Europe…..

Holy shit.Heading into the wild blue yonder with one of the worlds most respected record labels behind us.Stoked.Summer….and porn. I know what I will be spending my per Diem on!

Australia…..

Seems the be the abusive boyfriend to our lovestruck whitetrash driven existence. Its one black eye to many at this point so its time to go. I know who has our back here and as a tribe they are formidable. We will come back to you. We will make you proud.
Its shitful cause the whole last time I was away I did nothing but big ups all my beloved Aussie bands. They have done the same in return for us. It’s all good. Its the bottom feeders with marginal talent and whopping great drug habits mixed with delusions of grandeur that creates the shit.
Mediocre talent and peanut brains.
You gotta forgive them. Can you imagine how sad their lives are?
That don’t mean that I forget though….. they keep me striving. So boo ya sucks to the haters. I wont give up EVER because you want me to. Hows your waken preparation goin’ anyway? Oh that’s right! YOUR NOT GOING.
I gotta stop here cause I am laughing to hard and its slowing down my typing……

Ok,sorry.Composed now.

Stress……

By the bucket load. Rob writes me from LA. “This is our “Vulgar Display” he tells me. I butt heads with Ash and pray that I can get higher to drop lower. The new shit is massive though. Gone back to tearing myself apart. The next round is not gonna be so free and easy live. Not so many bits. It’s just me hitting the stage with this fucking machine and I think that’s somewhere that I really do need to be. Scary shit cause the last year has been fun up there but I can hear the bad shit in me stirring and I gotta go with it or I am lying to myself.

The greatest fear for me anyway is not knowing what is gonna happen up there and wondering if I am gonna come back from it.

Will it serve me ,take me forward or kill me?. This is the shit that I wind myself up on so hard that I sweat I cant articulate. My journal just sits there and I burn. I don’t even know where to start.

At the beginning.

I don’t like who I have been and how I let my life get on top of me for the last year. I should have my life up on statutory rape. It’s all flown by and all I do is think that I am always gonna fuck it up. I do I guess. Now I just wanna get paid for it.

I leave myself behind because I spend so much time inside my head. I come back at the world that I hate is baying for my blood once again.

Don’t engage with the small shit.

That’s about it I guess.

Gonna go and start packing shit up. Buy some food.Write.You know the deal.

Fuck you if you fuck with me. I am eternal.

SF4L
Michele