Canberra.

save me!!!

I feel that this entry is a rock powered SOS flare burning its way out,spluttering, across the cruel Canberra sky.

My ass is stuck to the chair and I am panting like a pampered dashound.Breathing air that tastes like it has already filtered through at least three sets of diseased lungs before it got to me.Alternatly listening to the Obituary anthology and Charlie Parker. Setting myself the only soundtrack that could ever do this place in time any justice.Burning through batterys like wishes.Night terrors that keep me out of bed and glued to The big screen TV.. My heart pounding “Hit me daddy,three to the bar”.All and sundry are happily informing me that it will be close to 36 degrees when we hit the stage on Saturday.I hate people.I cant wait to get up there.I want to scream so hard I puke.I have been pacing these surburban streets rolling my tired eyes all week. I dunno if it was all a very good idea to tell you the truth.I have said that about this place all my life.This is the poisoned field that all my hate bloomed from.Should I get over it? Nah,I don’t think so.It has been there so long and is such a huge part of me that I think that I would miss it like a limb.Welcome home Kid.

I will not pass this way again.

Have not had a chance to catch up with Leeroy yet.hopefully tonite.I have been watching cable Tv and doing situps.I really do feel like the bad guy in a Sergio Leonne movie here.I walk anywhere and the place goes still and in my imagination I see the close ups on fists tightening and cut eyes flicking before the 1st scream and the bar stools go flying.I walked to the store the other day to pick up some photos and out of sheer boredom.Got my happy snaps and went to walk home.As I passed the TAB all the space monkeys stopped blowing their kids collage funds for 5 minutes and all did amazingly passable inpersonations of  “Cletis the slack jawed yokel” from the Simpsons..

What to do?..

I threw my head back,roared and ran at the window at 100 miles an hour.Stoped short of smashing the fucker and blew a raspberry on the window flipped the bird and sauntered onward to the family pile.

You shoulda seen their heads: priceless.

Like I said not a whole lot to do here.Oh Man! I hit the mall! The last time I saw that many women cursed by the tracksuit fairy I was in Texas.Damn! Talk about junk in the trunk! This place is a half / half between The Stepford Wives and the Deliverance. I mean I am only just on the wrong side of 25 and there are people I knew when I was a slack assed disenfranchised youth in this godforsaken burb who have got 3 kids for fuck sake! I don’t even know one end of a baby from the other! I guess that I was smoking behind the bike shed the day that they handed out the slip that you had to sign in blood and hand back to ensure that you cashed all your dreams in by the age of 21.

This place gives me fucking heartburn.

My Brother Jr is in town for the night.Good to see him again;what can I tell you; we sign everything to Saint Tina “The Good son and The Bad Seed.” That about sums it all up.He has just gone for a run while I sit here spewing all my crap out onto Whitetrash.Like Chuck Mosley would wail is a dirty job but some ones gotta do it; Saint Tinas computer is powered by a disgruntled hamster on a rusty wheel.

I cant wait to throw myself at the mercy of my band tommrow.In the carpark at the uni “Never!” She gasps “Let Me come here again!!” Fuck! Diamanda Galas does the greatest version of Screamin’ Jay Hawlkins “put a spell on you.” Gives my goose bumps goose bumps if ya know what I mean.

I was thinking a lot about the last Metal for the brain that I got to go to before my life got in the way I guess.My X-Husband had a Metal shop and we had a stall at M4TB in ’99.I ran around like a fool all day and standing on my chair watching Blooduster I swore that I would be on that stage one day.That I would get to come back to the place that damaged Me the most on my on terms and dropfire.I don’t think at this point that anyone ever gets a “break” so to speak.You just do what you do and enjoy all the small greenstick fractures.Could be that one day they all add up and that is the mythical “Break”. Hell! Whadda I know! The heat is addling my peanut brain.

The Coolest drummer in the world [ TM ] called the other night to tell Me that the jam that they had booked went swimmingly.Wish that I could have been there but at the start it is always better if I am not around. Always good to hear. The new stuff is cool. The song that I have got a real bug up my ass about is called “Small Enemy” Sets me off like I have just pissed on an electric fence.Not gonna tell ya about the 2nd one as I wanna change the name but the 3rd one is dirty and low.It is all about the Bassline. I wrote it on the back of the Deftones setlist while watching the ping- pong wars at BDO last year for the object of My ever missguided affection.It is called “Sand.”. We are jamming and playing hardcore on the lead up to The BDO.Gotta get the new babies rolling for album 3!!! Got some killer shows including one with The Hard Ons at The Surry Hills Excelisor. Coool! Tell Me Oh mighty Sikfuks!!!,Tell me what you think of the new stuff when you hear it.

Holy shit! Album 3! File THAT under “Hell yeah!â€�

I will catch you all after I recover from the weekend.
See ya in the pit!
SF4L.
Michele.