And this is another song all about ME!

-Stupid here at the Newtown show.

I keep a close watch on this heart of mine
I keep my eyes wide open all the time
I keep an eye out for the tie that bind
Because your mine
I walk the line.
-J.Cash
[aka;His lordship on high ect,ect.]

Two amazing shows over 48 hours and as always I thank you from the bottom of my pirates heart.[“Arghhhhh!”]I saw so many people that I have not seen in so long at the Newtown show and it was truly bitter sweet.I dont know when we are all going to be together again…I am making this sound like the end of “Grease” aint I! Sorry!

Lets make the most of what we got Ok?

Ok I will start at 3 somthing this morning when me and Mike pealed back into Chez Rock after a magic show up the ‘gong.Thank you to all who showed up with their amazing energy and drove us to sonic meltdown on a stage the size of a milk crate.Thanx to Ohana who gave me back spider web and ruby strung memories of Jeff Buckly breaking my heart on dusty long ago stages.Antonio the great for going the extra mile and making it sound like Wembly!!!!

Hope that all [Yes You Miss Susan! Stage diving queen.] Had a great time at the high Voltage fest in Smackcentral.[ Aka;Melbourne.] So much fucking great Australian bands doin’ there thing.Gives me an aural girl boner! Keep going and seeing it all.
LA!
Go and check out the interview that me and Mikey did on fasterlouder.com.au. Mike?
a god.
Moi?
A tool.
Natch.

To everyone who took the time to talk to Me after the show.I thank you.Your stories ,dreams and faith are the most precious of all things and knowing that you are out there in the boondocks living it every day [ And belive Me when I tell you that I know what it feels like ’cause I came from much of the same….] Stay true and it will serve you well. It will be great to come and play for you again.

Stay in touch…ya’ll family now! Thanx to the Big A for the show and damn my beloved Pod People for having to play Melbourne.Before I start really chewing your ears off I want to send a get well to one of the finest front men I have ever known.Tony Van Roth,take it easy with your broken self and take care.To any of you Bloodduster fans out there Tony came a cropper at a show in Gelong a few weeks ago so hit the site and send him your best..

So…
Me and Mike rock in at sparrows fart after the ‘gong to find the amazing B* ensconsed on the sofa of doom with most of the Hell city glamours looking like a cat with a gob fulla canary! I dread to think what Archie was up to except I am sure that it could get you arrested in most of the more tradiditioal southern states in the US.That and Oscar giving all lead singers a bad name by spending the nite flaked out on the floor.Robbie and Mo as always were total gentlemen and much rock trivia and assorted bullshit went on untill well after sunrise.

I took it apon myself to inform them that they are like the untrainable puppy in the pound of rock which tickled them no end! If you are out Bondi way they will be cutting sick with Demolition High style this comming sunday.[Hey Scott!]
Go and check it out and dont forget to say hi to the B* if you see her there as she is getting her kicks before the whole shithouse goes up in flames.She is leaving within 2 weeks…sniff.

“Why are you going to Guam babe?” I sighed ,arms crossed behind my head continplating the mold that has been growing across our bedroom cealing.I am convinced that it is Joe Strummer trying to contact me from the other side.But that is a whole other story. “Because its there.”She sighed.
Well!
I guess that is a fucking good a reason as any.
I have a feeling that many wild oates are to be sown….

Heheheheh….

Oh!
The RSL show.
Primo room that.I dont think that I am gonna do the cordless mike again.I felt like a mutated gameshow host! but I cannot thank all the other acts that were on with us enough and all the people that came.I know that there were alot of cool things going down that nite so when you decide that we are the deal for that nite it means everything.I got to many highlights screaming round in my head so dont get pissed at me if I leave you out but this is some of the shit that my addled brain remembers….You were ALL amazing.

Miss Karen playing The Rollins band,seeing Lena happy,The Princess and Miss Renno and co making the treck in,Nanda getting Skot shitfaced,Wonjo,Marty and Miss Ceila,Sweden and Bolt and the bubble,AW getting better every fucking time,the look on Markc Sikfuks face [x],Miss Yvette ,Miss Jack the Aw mistress,Miss Maggie putting her awsome band back together,Miss Shelia giving me a pen that looks like a loaded syringe that makes all who see it gag!,Darling Matt style King,The Fasterlouder crew,Mikeys crash hitting the floor one song in,The light show of doom,Sam SF jumping on stage for “Allergic”,New sikfuks and old alike,and last but not least ya’ll screaming ‘Kill em all and let God sort em OUT!” back at Me.

FUCKING GREAT NITE.

Ya’ll really have no idea how great you are and what you mean to all of us as a band and how much I for one am gonna miss ya’ll.

I am writing and trying to get well at the moment.Delux found me a doctor that I dont belive is the antichrist for a change so I am making a bit of headway on that front.Ash is telling Me that he is gonna burn me a copy of the 40 odd [ in more ways that bloody one!] songs that we have been writing since the BDO.All the bits that are dreck are Moi.The good shit is Manning and the boys.So to all you sikfuks who are on the SF site we will have more for you to download real soon….

Throwing out a thanx to Mike at fierce.com in America for bestowing the honnor of us being the first feature band. A cool site that just keeps getting better.If you dig it extreem go check it out! And “Damage” getting an airing on rage.Cool as Fuck! Every time you guys vote and show your support it just pushes it all harder!

Happy 4th of July To all The Sikfuks out in the US.
Toddski and Goochmonster?
Have a brew for me!
It will be so good to see you again.Thanks to for all writing Me from the US and Canada.Cant wait to hook up with ya’ll on the road.It is gonna be a blinder.

Big congrats to Nath from Stolckholm Syndrome and his beautiful woman on the birth of their Son Jet.And while on the subject go and check out his new record store “Paint it Black” on Enmore Rd in Newtown.Rose Tattoo live in 81’ for 11 bucks!!! This shop now has the Blackie and Michele stamp of ‘ARGHHHH!!!” all over it.Great staff ,Great Zines and mega sounds……

Listening to:
G’n’R bootlegs.
Outkast
Janes Addiction
ELO
“Exile on Main street”
Led Zep 1 and 3
Vixen
The Shine
Black Flag
The White Album
The Black crows

Reading:
“All the selves I was” Michele Roberts.
“Choke” Chuck Palahunk
‘Pissing in the gene pool” H.Rollins.
“Selected poems” DH Lawerence
“Lennon” Albert Goldman

The last one I am totally ashamed of. I hope that he is roasting in hell. Fuck with Elvis? Yeah…I am gonna have an issue or two with you….

I gotta go .B* just made me a Tea for Me in between skinning up for her fine self and sticking ‘High Fidelity” Back in the Video…..She is the bomb.
See ya soon.Need me ? Write.
Later.
Stay true….
SF4L
Michele

Living in a hellhole!

-Spinal Tap.

The only time that you should doubt me
Is when you belive you can live without me…
-“Goodmorning”

Please pardon the fuck outta Me.
Its not that I have not had anything to say [ Somehow I doubt that will EVER be a problem!] More the flipside.Too much to say and do so I wound myself up a treat and went up my beloved river…..

Even if I had of had somthing to say for a few weeks there no one could understand me anyway.I picked the most sadistic dentist in the history of pain and proceeded to hand over my airfair and got drilled, root canaled and extracted.Ok.So now I have no money…can ya’ll guess what happened next? Lung infection.No shit.Stupid here thinks that she is a fucking Rolex watch.Well a cross between that and the mail.I take a licking and keep on ticking and I gotta get through no matter what !@#!#@! [ “Jesus-fuckin’-please-us!!! screamed my beaten immune system ]. So,
To cut a long and stupid story short.
I am fucked.

Just got a call from Delux telling me that he booked our tickets out of here.All I can think is that all the tat that surrounds me is not worth selling and I make a crap theif.
What to do……

The highlight of the last month as always has had to do with music.Had a magic time playing out at Panthers.Took me ages to get the spray paint off my hands after the fact.[ If you are a sikfuk you will know exactly what I am talking about…..] Two words.
Fingerprint Resistant.
See them or regret it.
Oh yeah! To the 3 lovely ladies who presented their fine under aged racks to my sharpie weilding ham-fisted myopic self for signage? Thank you for one of the most rock moments ever!!!!!!
Hell,Thanx to all the sikfuks who made their way out to that baby Vegas out in the burbs’.I didnt want to leave the room! I kept thinking that it would be unwise to do so without leaving a trail of breadcrumbs.If you have never seen this place it is HUGE. There is even a whole “Kiddyland” Bit where the little ones can play while Marter and Parter throw their education funds into the gaping maw of a poker machine.The sadist in me rubs her fine boned hands with glee at the supidity of humanity.

I hate Doctors.
Just thought that I would get that one in there. I never thought that I would say this but being ill is making me even meaner than before.I just did not think that is was possible to tell you the truth. All the songs that I am writing at the moment are comming from disease and insomnia.The B* should have a day named after her for putting up with me and as is well known already ,Delux is a saint and I am a bitter motherfucker held together with scars and spite.I wake up sweating bullets with horses of flame running through the snow.

They say that you have your whole life to write your 1st album.I can dig that.It was easy ’cause you are hanging to get it all out there, you are just so fucking stoked to be doing it…The 2nd one? Lets just say that I had enough bullshit going on to fertilize the Sahara and turn it into a market garden.Nothing that I have not told you guys about.But the 3rd? ho-HO!
This is the “Betrayal” Platter.
I think that all the songs that mean the most to me this round are just big fat ugly car crashes and they have all be directly inspired by the people close to Me. Or that were. Lets just say that there are alot of kiss-offs on this one.Feel free to include them on mix tapes to anyone you hate! I would be fuckin’ flattered.

Ash has astounded Me with his understanding.Believe me that many have NOT.Pressure brings truth.
I am surrounded by cowards.
Fuck em.
My new-ish idea involes landmines and a compound in the swamps.Dont drop in with out calling is all that I am saying….snort.

So ,for my last “What the fuck!” in olde Sydney town, one of my all time favorate bands made their way up from Mexico and rocked it at The Marquee. There are some bands that shift your blood the wrong way around in your veins.They become the sound track to the movie that you have always wanted to star in.They make you feel better about everything and at the same time make you think like you can handle it all……

One of those bands for me is The Shine. Ever since the 1st time we had the honnor of fucking shit up with them down south a year ago I have been a fan.

So to Powerhead, The hell City Glamours and The Shine…thank you from the bottom of my jet black fan boy heart for making my last big night out in this whore of a city with my sweet sister and the sikfuks worth its weight in sonic gold.

Friday nites at The Marquee is the place to be.”Eleven” goes off.Dont be a pack of whiney ingrates who complain that nothing is going on…It is! I know cause I broke my toe having a bonding moment on the dancefoor in my pimpin’ boots with half the Glamours to “Youth gone wild” by Skid Row.

Gold.

Cant wait to play for ya’ll tommrow night.I just want to give it away. It is the only thing that means shit to Me. Now more so than ever.You are all gonna get to see Me lose what little grip I had left on anything.I dont quite know if “Fun” is the word.Lets just make a pretty fair assumption that it wont be boring.

Made a dick of myself yet again on the radio.Dom Romeo took the time to interview me for the ABC.Thanks Man. Delux told me that I should think before I speak…HA! Like we would have any songs at all if that was the case.I hate listening to interviews that sound like some one is yanking ya chain.
Mistakes rock. Flaws rule! Fuck perfection like sex with the ex that you HATE. I mean it.
Perfection will not comfort you no matter what the mainstream shoves down your neck.It will not make you a better person and it is not gonna save you.

Excuse me for a second while I struggle with my discman….Everyone just rolled in and I view human company up there with assult and battery.[ Now I wanna listen to Metallica!!!]
I cannot stand it.Half the people I live with are on some kind of go given mission to ignore me and/or drive me crazy which reinforces my belief that you are only good for what you can provide. I get fobbed off with the old chesnut that “You are too intense Michele!”
[Read; “I got what I needed out of your loyalty and blind devotion and now I am gonna cut you lose because I am a shallow two faced cunt…later”]

Funny thing is that this was my last run. I was married once.Fucked it up so that was that.Had a few relationships.They sunk.Friends? Not many and to my profound disapointment,not true.[I was not being sarcastic there….] This was the year that I really worked it all out for keeps.It has been a series of emotional fractures and now my ass is in traction.

From the letters that ya’ll write Me that last rant should look pretty goddamed familier. You guys are the shit……….

There is somthing in human nature that so badly wants to belive.Giving up is like the load that never stops blowing.thats MY jones right fuckin’ there bay-bee! I was a fairytale kind girl.Take heavy and hectic note of that past tense action employed there…. Now I am some kind of stereo powered killing machine. I dont know if I would have picked this but seeing as it has singled Me out? What the hey!.

I really did lose the “Unlose-abe” ones this year. I did not think that I could ever be shocked again.It was not a question of hurt.Thats boring and old hat.Wah,wah.
Shock though? That was a good one and I am GLAD that it happened to me.
One of my band members asked me if I trusted him.”Nope.” I replied.And then he had the gall to look all injured. I am not the one you get to lie to you.The rest of the world will do that for you.It is not a service that I was trained to provide.

Who do you trust?
Who has your back?
Now,stop talking shit and tell yourself the truth….
Not pretty huh?

Lets move on shall we?
What is going on at “Chez Rock”…..
Ah.
Delux is home and hosed from India and carting my rotten sulking ass from specialist to specialist.He will be telling ya’ll about his trip in “Uprooted” I am sure. The B* is sitting on the floor as I write this sniffing like a Peruvian Coke baron.I can hear her over Lynard Skynard AND the TV. She wont go to the doctors.I just looked at her and shes all like”Ignore me!!!!” I cant! She sound like a broken vacume full of snot.She is hitting the road in less than a month.Who knows when we will see each other again…..

Blackie is gonna be back out on tour in about a week.Over to England to play with The Exploited,no less!!!! See ya bro.There is another head that I will not see in a while.I think that they are gone for a month or so.Getting the last of the British summer,such as it is.I would tell you what Nanda is up to except that I dont know as most of the time she walks through a room and looks at me like I am somthing that was stuck to the bottom of her size 5’s.I will take a stab in the dark and say that what ever it is will involve Rock and travel.

Mikey is working on a “Need to know” basis.I just let it go. He is still the best drummer I know.Have you ever seen that movie “Falling Down”?. Take that and give it a shot of Joe Peshi and volia!

Ash is under house arrest without the ankle bracelet.He is trying to get as many songs done as he can and is.

Everything is about to change and I welcome it.I need out of here and away from a good 99% of the people I know…..
You too huh?
Run with it…….

See you in the pit
SF4L
Michele

Im a fool when I need you.

-Im a fool to believe…
Rollins Band.

-Wah!
me.

Delux is going to India.
I have not seen Ash.
Me and Mike fight till we go puce.
Rock and roll.
Send money.
Think of us like a religion….
A cause.
*Cough!*
Got a toothache.
Playing a gig during daylight tommrow.
B* going to Japan to break hearts and heads.
Written a mess of new songs.
You guys rule.
I am getting my ears cut off.[ No lie, B* is gonna video it for the DVD ….gross huh?]Ya’ll can call me Lt Chopper!
Its cold.
FUCK IT!I am to bummed out to be depressed even…peh.
Bed.
ZZZZZZ.
SF4L
Michele.

29/5/04….early afternoon.

“I got ONE thing to say to Craig from the Vines….”Someone need a hug!…Ya cunt!”
-My opening line Thursday nite.
[Classy huh?]

Before I get into the rock thang I got a weird as hell fable for you that has shaken me to the core…Read on Oh mighty Sikfuks…..
Woke up in a pool of sweat.

Dream –
I lived in a small town and was looked at strange as I was an educated young woman when most girls were not sent to school. My mother,father and I all lived in one huge room. We were not well off but we were happy. Both my parents were teachers.The decree came through that The German army was going to occupy our town.I did not know what was happening but I felt that I was about to experance a huge feeling of loss. A void was about to occur.

My parents thought that it was nothing to worry about. Not really. One night while still able I went down to the small theatre in town with armfulls of my writing and wrapped in a sheet I burried all my dreams on paper in case I ever got to come back.Like a dog I burried my youth. As I snuck out the back the SS were moving in the front…

We had no idea that the Germans were loosing the war and that we were a part of what Berlin called “The Final Solution”

The war was falling apart and Hitler decreed in his last will that “The war on the “Judea” [Jew] was to be ongoing…To never stop…”

We were to pack our “35kgs” I had a hatbox. The same one that I tour with now and I thought that if I packed books, Books by well know German writers,that they would see that I was different.That and a huge white inpractical dress that the female guard laughed at as I was processed.Mikey was there and talking to 3 other women from my village as well as Me in perfect Greman.One of the women taught German at the school. we asked “Why are you doing this to us?” And with his sad eyes he replyed “There are just some things that we dont like about “you” people”…..

He lead us through a beautiful garden.Insult to sad injury.On the other side the cattle cars were waiting…

I ended up in Buchanwald.

And in the final “days” [Almost a year] leading to liberation the guards would not let me die. They kept me alive to see what “I would say next” I watched my intire world burn alive and they kept me as a red eyed stunned big mouthed pet.
Dont you see?
My words saved my life.I had to keep talking. I was a Jewish Salome to these animals.

1000 nights of fire and fables.

After liberation alone I made my way “Home”…most of it in ruins.The theatre was bombed out. Evadence of The SS having had offices set up…Desks,filing cabnets…..I climbed over it all unaware of my dimished health,The lice burrowed in my skin,the stubble on my head….Down to the stage,under…to the bowels.Piles of pilfered loot that I am sure the SS thought that they would return for….From the houses of My dead kin and townfolk….

With bare hands I clawed and dug…And there, 18 long months later…no longer a child.Burning fat lingering in my head from the overloaded ovens at the camp…My words.

Words.
And I survived all.
I lost everything.
I was “What happened next”.

So I wake up LOOSING it.
As you can imagine! It was so fucking vivid. Mikey was gobsmacked as I fell downstairs half asleep and related the whole tale to him rubbing the goose flesh on my arms…he went a few shades paler. I sat there asking “Why?”

You think that everything will always be there and it was gone.

I have no idea why I am telling ya’ll this.Going for a dip in my murky subconcious! Fuck! I usually wake up screaming unable to remember the terror but this time…I rolled over,tried to wake and it kept sucking me back under.

Any of you got any theories on this one feel free to write Me! All I know is that it has landed Me in a shit mood and I am up and so is the sun and as ya’ll know that is NEVER a good sign…I just hope that the vibes did not leak over to the B* …happens you know…I have these hell dreams and she catches them. Sorry!

Ok.
Nuff’ about my bullshit persicution dreams…. Naxul totally ruled last nite and The Rev Kris Hades made Mike and myself sick with his opening effort which is all you can ask for a night of Black Metal![ “Kris! Ya make Me wanna hurl! ” “Great Mish!” Beams He of all that is Gross back at Me…] If you laid all the Hair in the Metro end to end last nite you would have ended up in Melbourne! [Am now humming “Whole lotta Love” but replacing “Love” with “Locks” .Snigger.] Good to catch up with alot of old faces…heaps of whom wished I had faded away…WORST LUCK MOTHERFUCKERS!

[“Saw you in Rolling Stone” He sneered up at me. “So,Still working at the 7-11?” I smiled back, lashes batting…Dipshit! Christ people shit Me. He went an odd shade of puce and slunk back to the bar.]

I like music. I dont hide behind it…[You know who you are]….had some really great chats all the same! I was in drummer fan heaven while Chatting to Mikey Q and Pete K. Both fucking monsters behind the kit..As I am sure you will all agree..Fan boy theory chat with Rod H.[“Fuckin’ shutterbugs!”…”Fuckin’ Lead singers!” hehehe…]

Get home to be informed by the ladies of Chez Rock that we had just been on Rage! The New clip so thanx to all who got on the guest book and made em play it! Great end to a great evening!

My deaf as fuck big brother is cooking somthing with too much garlic in it and listening to the stereo on full so I hope that b* falls down stairs and thumps him for sheer entertainment value. I hope that I fully convey the joys of share living thrugh all this drivel.

I am still up for being a hermet.Howard Hughes sans tissue boxes if you will. I cant fucking wait to never see anyone ‘sept for at shows ever again.

Blackie is the TRUE germ-a-phobe. And dogshit magnet…Such language to offend My tender ears! I nearly busted a nut laughing!

Speaking of busting a nut….
The show at The Annandale was great! Thank you to all the Sikfuks who came out on a crapulent Thursday to catch us set it off with One shot kill and a little group that opened for us…erm…gimme a second…The Pains?…The Non -original-rip-offs?…Nope. Thats not it….Quaint littles buggers they were too…OH! thats it! The Vines!

Soon to be residing in the “Where are they now file”

Look,Not everyone is gonna dig everything.I sure as hell dont!That there is a solid. Plenty of people hate what I do and good luck to them. But one thing that makes me SICK,Will ALWAYS hack Me off, is bands that rip off their fans.

I SEE RED! I WANT TO KILL!!

People came from all over the country.For What?To see them throw a tanty and break shit…Boo-hoo.And play what? 3 songs? Gimme a break!

[NOTE;DO NOT MIX UP YOUR AMBITION WITH YOUR ABILITY.IT WILL SHOW YOU UP EVERY TIME….]

Of course I [I have now decided that My Indian name is “Big Mouth Running” ] went off about it our whole set. We went off. Mike trashed his kit so I put My foot through a moniter [Accident! I swear!] Almost broke my leg! Headbutted Ross…felt so nice we did it twice!Mike chucked his sticks after the Mega ROCK ending so in the spirt of band solidarity I stripped off My “SF4L” custom-made-on-my-floor-half-an-hour-before-the-show wifebeater and pegged it at the pit from the riser!Felt SOOOO RocK! Marc SF faught for it and when I got my shit tight post show and came down to hang with the family HE WAS WEARING IT!!!! Now that is some kinda loyal! I sweat like a pig!!! My sturnum is not looking so kosher either..Its gonna be a wicked scar!.Tried to Show Pete at the Metro last nite but he said “Sorry! Only clocked ya tits!”

And so on that note…After covering The Second WW,SF4L,Fan lurve, Black Metal,The Vines, Tits and Injury catologue I am gonna go and pass out!

No J. I did not Belt him. I only fuck with worthy foe! And I miss you too Toddski,The King of NY!To all you SF’S keep the mail comming. I think you are the shit!

Remember…it aint gonna lick itself.
SF4Lc Michele.

I wanna get free!

-The Vines

-Well! On ya fukin’ bike then mate!
Me.

Oh my fucking sides! ..Oh!…A-hahahahah!
The Vines are opening for us at The Annadale Tonite.
Gimme a sec…Ohhhh! [Snort!]
Well that is the way that I wanna see it. Deal is this. The Vines are playing at 7 to a pack of comp winners.Am I going? No. But vis-a-vis the rules of rock?
If you are on 1st? You are “Opening”.
If you are on last? “Headlining”
So …..
NER NER NER NER NER.

Just when I think that sweet fuck all could put a lopsided grin on my jaded visage….Will wonders never cease? Well! I fuckin’ hope not!

Us playing with The Pod People is cursed. It is so Spinal Tap that it makes Me wanna blow chunks. No we are not playing with them…in the ‘gong’….again. But if you live in Smackcentral [ aka; Melbourne.] head to the High Voltage fest to check em’ cause they rule.

I will be here picking My dreads and setting things on fire. [“Here kitty,kitty….”]

Can you imagine if any Vines fans hang out to see what
a real band can do tonite?
FUCK ME this is gonna be fun!!!!!!
See you after the fact.
SF4L
Michele.

I could pass by

Forget what I’ve learned
Stay stupid
Stay burned……..
-“Fracture”

-Learn to swim….
-Tool.

Now THAT Is what I like!
Its all shit really.
You know, School,work all of it and then you go and follow a dream and whatnot and then you find other people who are digging on what you do and by FUCK! but its the best feeling.

Tony and Box. There are 2 Sikfuks for you. Drove up from Orange with a bunch of mates to see us play. Now that alone had Me gobsmacked. But the ‘tallica patch? The Cowboy hat??#@!#@!#! You Rock Tony. Thank you man… They saw us at The BDO and got it. Got where we are at. This is what I mean when I say and tell you how much you guys blow my mind….

On a good day I hardly get it right but you guys always pull Me back to where I wanna be….

I am shagged! [ Tired you perverts!!! Heheheh…] I am at the end of one long cool as hell weekend. Just got back from a poster run with Mikey. He kills Me. The cops were around so I just say “Howsit?” And they are cool.I just tell them that I am one of my old flatmates that I hate if they ask for a name and They tend to Clock the 10 feet of dreads and cammo shorts and leave me be. But Mike? Mikey Runs down a lane dropping everything,tape and posters flying behind his beanie clad skinny self so, naturally, they give chase and get him up against the wall where he informs them “That I am not a rapist officers!” Bless! The put 2 and 2 together and asked him whih band he was doing this for….

Lemme get back to the beginning…Friday night. Galic club. Scribe. Un-fucking-real. Me and the B* got the party started. You had the typical Sydney crowd. “I am just gonna pay $28 to stand here and look bored off my tits” Yawn. Fuck off. Not I said the fly! We were onto that dance floor in the blink of an eye! I danced,We danced our butts off. The Dj was soooo cool. Dropped Digital Underground,Dre,Snoop,De la soul….MMMM! Old school! Tribe called quest! Hell yeah!So we had the whole front to ourselves.

It was funnay as hell to tell the truth cause we were throwing air like it was nobodys buisness so all the girls with little and or no funk whatsoever gave us dirty looks while all the huge dudes made their way over to us. Me and B* were loosing it “Alright bruver?”…”AllRIGHT Bruv!” ….”ALL RIGHT BRUVER!!!!” We screamed in each other sweating gourds after ever mix. Fucking soccer hoodlums I tell ya! [The “All right??” Line comes from a top shelf flik called “Human Traffic” Funny as fuck….]

People never fail to amuse me. I loved the looks we got.As you know I tend to take myself everywhere I go and dont change the visuals so to speak. What you see is what you get. I was talking to someone the other day that I have known for about 3 years who has never seen Me out of shorts…so there ya go….anyway….We knew every word to every track and you could see how much it confused them. They could not place us there. All tattoos and metal studded belts. Front row to see a shit hot rap artiste….People are crap.

Thats what I was gonna write about so I figure that I should just say it and the we can move on to Saturday night…..The all ages at Rockdale.Which was where we came in…..Met alot of cool sikfuks that I only knew online and converted a few more….It was like all the school discos that I was never invited to!. I Crashed out in the van for a while and wouldnt ya know it! Thats when the fun starts! Some fucker rolled up dipped his grotty little hand in the till and fucked off with $600 bucks! I shit you not! Some of the crew gave chase and the cunt pulled a blade…

I hope that he was a junkie.
Truth.
And I hope that he ran laughing all the way to his dealers and that they pissed themselves over how easy it was to rip us off and then to celebrate? I hope that he shot a double,Hot as hell with strychnine to boot, and that it was as inpure as my thoughts and that he od’d…..
If that is the case?

That means that we killed him.

Good.

Cool fun show.Had to cut it short and played under fluro lights through a supermarket sound system that was paining our super sound man “Antonio the great” [You can call him that if ya like,He dosent mind a bit.] And I loved EVERY SECOND OF IT!!!

I am not being a narky cunt! I mean it. I love that I get to do what I do so much. We are up again on Thursday night at my Favorate stomping ground, The Annandale. The new shit is killer, you sikfuks are killer and its all good.

Ok….so I get woken up by my drummer shaking me to go and break bread [ Well, Tea and bickkies…] with Miss Monika and Miss Jacinta from Fasterlouder.com.au. for an in depth on all the dirt. We raved [ Read: I talked shit] for ages and Mike even got a few words in edge ways and they bestowed swag [ cool as fuck tee-shirts!] on our rotten asses no less!
I am a spoilt brat.

Go check the site. And not just because we are on it. Miss M and her band of Pirates are as passionate about music of all shapes and sizes as I/we are. And they are in it for the love of the game. They have about two and a half thousand people sighned up which renews a bit of lost faith in Moi,which,by the by is no easy task. Get off the porn for a second and check it out.

So I am utterly shagged!Listening to Tool and writing to you.My kingdom for a bathtub! B* was keeping the sofa warm but shes gone so its just us.[ Kinky!] I am gonna throw the TV out to get her to read more books. I am wrapped that the Video has spat it to tell the truth. Last place that I had [ The Shed ] was no Tv . Not that I am a fan. It shits Me to tears to tell you the truth and videos are visual crack. I get nothing done when attempting to watch all of the “Police Academy” movies in a row…as one does….[right?] …erm…anyway…fuck it! Read a book! Go for a skate! write a song! call your Mom! Just do somthing…….

I would not go as far as doing the laundry but…..

And to the SF who asked.
Its not stalking till I press charges.How sweet!

While on “Sweet”…The Princess wrote Me the other day to tell me that she had seen a massive “SF4L” tagged up on a wall. You brazen fuckers!!! Well done and dont get caught!!! She said that she got all teary eyed…ditto that!

[ Note to self; Tinned spagetti and nutella do not
compliment each other in ones digestive system.]

Think that I am gonna hurl.
I will see ya come thursday at The ‘Dale…be there!

Eye for an Eye as they say in the good book [snort!]
SF4L
Michele.

Here is one for all the Sikfuks who wrote me hurting

(Who wrote Me at all…I hope this helps a little and yes I do know what you are tallking about and No I dont think that its stupid..Ok? Try this one on for size.I know you will get it…..SF4L.)

It drives them crazy ’cause I wont be cool.
Its too late baby….
-Ozzy Osbourne.

May I never be complete.
May I never be content.
May I never be perfect.
-Chuck Palahniuk.

I just seem to be a writing fool at the moment now dont I? Its worth it. Hell cheaper than some Freudian fuck-knuckle telling My reclining-on-a-chase-lounge-kinda-caper “….Zat yoo ‘ave issues with your gender Mee-shele and…” Wah,wah,wah…That was a stab in the dark but I am usually on the ball. It is also cool that Ya’ll check in and write to me about me writing to and about you! Gulp! That line reminds Me of one of my all time favorate song titles.
“I forgot to remember to forget.”
Cool huh?

[Trying to say thanx for all the letters that I wake up to each day!]
I was writing my fat butt off earlier and the pen almost melted! I shit you not! Got Me a hand cramp the size of a small car.I am rolling hard and taking the piss at every available junction. Heh!
Traitors.
They dont know that I know.Which keeps them close to Me.I know where they sleep.Defeatist dogs.I pick My battles.I am flowing and creating new reserves.I will need it all where I am heading. This point HAD to be Chaos incarnate.This ugly.I welcome the pain that is butting and bruising my human frailties right out of this fucked up carcass that I house Myself in.
By the second.

I love it when I am low. Close to the ground.I wrote someone the other day that I am “silently loud”….I am only mentioning this to you guys to set the mood. You see,When I am “here”…I watch “them” panic. It is the offical “Couldnt give less of a fuck” zone with Me right now and its allllllll good. Drinks are 2 for one all night and the living is easy. Sorry about the rotting corpses that seem to endlessly litter this little vistas foxy views…but ya’ll know me?!…and its so HARD to get good help these days…Where was I? … Just hold your breath…nah! Where are my manners…Look here…take My ‘kerchif and hold it over your little old nose while the margiritas get mixed and you and I will have a high rollin’ good time.Dont make any fast moves and keep your eye on the little rubber ball…..

Stupid holds no water.
Cute does not last.
Aerosmith coulda written “Jaded” about Me.[ HA!] I have seen every trick and more likly than not did it before the best part of you was running down your daddys leg…Hey!Awwwww!..Dont go! I am just warming up!.. Dont be like that! C’mon man! Siddown….You asked for someone who would tell you where its at and here I am! You cant leave on a bum note! We are just getting started….

Was’ dat?….Oh the old …”I think that I know it all just cause I am in a band and throw my weight around and who the hell do I think I am to be talking to you ,YOU! Of all people this way and another thing…..” Honk,honk FUCKIN” HONK! Save it for Xmas dollface…sheesh!…WC Fields was right! I should quit giving suckers an even break but….

Has anyone ever told you how cute you look when you get angry?

Anyway. You came to me.Or for me? Never forget that.

I dont run it the way that you do. I am the tiny invader.The tick,The stubbed toe,The common cold.Nah…even better. I am more than a pain in the ass….I am the “Ache”. The one that you can never pinpoint for your Doctor “Because its…Its all over!…Then its gone…ect,ect”

In the Field?. I return to the beginning.Grunt 101.I take the hills and valleys. I walk through The Elephant grass for what feels like a million clicks and get up and do it all the next day. I dont mind one little-bitty-fuckin’ bit. Every time I see a tracer wiz by my ear? Every time there is action on the perimter?….I know that you are panic bound, Stressed if you will……That I am getting closer to what you want to protect from the likes of me and I feed on that….it takes me higher than any narcotic or fuck ever could…. I.The loser.The bottom of “Your” Percived pecking order.[Hey! Yeah NOW your starting to remember…dont get up old buddy,old Pal! Here! Have another one..Its on me…Huh? Nah I will stick with the water thanks….]I am getting to you.And It is driving you crazy.

Totally A-1 class- fucking- Crazy.

See,What you have gotta dig is that “They” dont teach this in private school.This is the natural evolution for Me. I am the result of a million “No’s” and emotional beat downs from you pack mentality motherfuckers.

You were soooo cocky! I loved sitting up in my snipers nest. You nervy as a finger fuck on the 1st date.Out on the battlefield trying to get your shit tight enough to take on one.An army! How flattering! Just for one big mouthed bitch who was getting away with blue murder.

I saw your medals glint in the sun. Vanity. I could pick you off by decending rank if I so chose but I am having more fun watching you huff and puff and try to blow my house down.

I am endless. You could pull my tounge out but the beauty of it all is that there is gonna be another one after Me.Just like the one that came before Me. And that alone will fuck with your great-grand childrens inner peace and that? Well! That amuses me no end.

What was that? Sorry !Memories! Whats that you say? Oh Honey! You listen but you sure dont hear. I am not bitter nor did I or do I want to be like you.Nice stab in the dark cutie! I am fine here.How do ya like THEM apples???

You have got nothing but the numbers…got it?
I dont need a uniform.
Or a map.
To tell me the truth,To tell me what to do or make me feel important.

Not Like you.Not of your kind.

And I will keep winning.Even when you call the shot and tell Me that I lose? I will let you have the little firefights.Smoke and mirrors.I dig kicking your ass too much to beat the snot out of you on EVERY level as you so richly deserve…I digress…Where, I ask you, would the fun be in that if you took your ball and pouted back home to hide behind you big education and trust funds? Huh?

The Maori warrior used to go out onto the battle field as the sun set to feed and tend their enemies so they would be well enough to get their asses kicked all over again the next day.

[mmmm….MM! You have no idea how much that tickles me.I am smiling fit to split right now.]

Was it always this way? Well, to be honest,I cant really say…nice question for someone as soused as your fine self…Garcon? Another drink for My future cannon fodder here!… but what I do know is that we created each other and need each other to keep this going. But…BUT!…. I will leave you just to fuck with you and then pop back up when you have relaxed…..BOOO!..Here! Damn! Now that was a waste of a perfectly good drink ! Lemme get cha another…It will dry in a second…..Silly I know but it always brightens my day.

You needed somthing to fear…Volia! Moi!
And I needed somthing stupid to practice on…I think thats your cue…And there you are! And lucky for me you just keep on breading!.Lordy!My aim is good.New targets every-live-long-FUCKING-DAY!!! I can brethe under water and see in the dark. I live on my toes and for this? For all that I am ? All that you will never be? I dedicate this one to you.

You bury your head in the sand? Dont yell “Unfair!” when I plant my foot up your ass.
End of story.
It?
Life?
Life WILL fuck you over and up IF I dont get to you 1st.Make no mistake there.It will get me too. It just dosnt bother Me the way it does you..How? Why?
I am here with you right now ain’t I?

If it dosnt get you the 1st time round the damndest thing tends to happen.Just like magic, Your “Cherry” lets call it ,grows back! And every time you dont learn? Well! Every time you make the same stupid mistake you will tear and bleed like the 1st. Agony.
Over and over.

So cross your legs or keep in in your pants.And dont come crying to Me seeing that I was the only one to ever take mercy on your sorry ass to tell you a truth that you were ill equiped to hear or deal with in the 1st place.I dont find it a waste of time…to the contrary…keeps Me in shape. You were lucky and you didnt even know it silly rabbit! That I said it and that you met Me. What were the chances huh? Of all the bars? In all the cities…….

I will be around. I like it here. I can finally see what it was that they were so afraid that I would become… And it fits like a glove. Sure! Lets do lunch sometime…You dont look too….Whoops! Thats cool man! Get it all out…aim over the…Woah! Hollow legs babe!…Here,I gotcha, wipe your mouth…
TAXI!

SF4L
Michele.

Theres a feeling I get when I look to the West….

-Led Zepplin.

-Get some,get some,get some, GO AGAIN!
The Rollins Band.

I was asked an interesting question yesterday about being up there and doing what I Do. The big olde showdown that takes place once you get on stage. I was asked how you handle singing the bone deep stuff,comming close to tears….I say to quote not only the B* but QOTSA…”Go with the flow.” I answered that “If you would feel that somthing was missing from your life? Well then…Dont stop.”

I have done it all up there.Well…. bar shitting myself….But in that vein I know Rossco has got some interesting fables….It is not ment to be beautiful. I want My Rock warts and all [LEMMY!] I do not now nor have I ever belived in wasting time going through the motions up there. Once you are in the ring you engage. As all readers of my esteemed late nite drivel know I am an “All or nada” kinda Girl. Why? Well fukit man!
Why the hell not?

We live in a souless place. We hold down crap jobs for a roof and some food. If some one is gonna drop a tenner to see us play?, To honnor us with their pit-presance, to turn a phrase, I and anyone who puts themselves on stage, would be insulting them and the music that sustains and drives not only myself but all fans, by not going all the way.

My heart beats with the beat of true fandom. I was offered a Ticket to see KISS by one of the most brillant Sikfuks, Dr Bolt. I have been lucky enough to see KISS before but there was somthing that did not ring true to me this round…..I want all or nothing…No Peter Criss doing “Beth”? no Michele….sigh.

I was touched at the offer though! I am one lucky broard but as we are all working our asses to the bone to get out of here I optioned to write insted of party this time.[ “Saint-fuckin’-Michele!”] I am unblocked so to speak. Recorded 3 newies with Ash last week and they were large. It really did a number on Me. It is like a scab that I have to pick .The more common sense or socity at large for that matter, tells Me to leave a subject alone the deeper I know I have to go into it. Tabboos breed on Fear and habit. Those ballroom days are over for me honey! My dance card is full of all the things that go bump in the night and we are cheek to cheek.

I run toward disaster.Naw…I do that slo-mo strut at the beginning of all good gangster flix….Sam Elliot. Two words that sum up Sooooomuch.

We all bulshit our way through life.I was told at a young age “Kid there are 2 types of people in this world. Masturbators and liars…” [My old man got it right once or twice.] Back to the subject at hand. I am all in favor of damage. Do yourself. Rebuild and do it again. Test yourself. It is all too numb and easy.Ya’ll dont stike me as “The numb an’ easy” Kind. Naw…didnt think so.

Which takes me back to the sound. The noise that has shapped Me.Handed and honed down from great tradition and talent was never picture perfect or even sober 90% of the time for that matter. It sweated on me,Made me cry,Kept me up for days with a single song on repeat and saved my life more than once. It glued me back together in a graveyard in New York freezing my ass off,questioning everything.with my discman and “The best Of Black Sabbath” and a thin coat when I knew that I was going to loose my husband and with him,My last ideas of love and the final vestiges of a normality and sanity that had denied me from birth.It took me back in with no questions When my Band were waiting for my AWOL stress fuled jett lagged ass 3 months later at the studio.No questions asked. I fell in love with the idea that you could close your eyes but sound is a given. I have never taken it for granted. I used to sing to myself along with the speed of the wipers whipping away the rain ,the cab thick with canned heat and ciggerette smoke, in My dads old pickup truck when I was a kid happy as a clam. Lets just say that sound never let me down.

I saw Jeff Buckley play his heart out on a roof top.[R.I.P] I watched Helmet open the doors to Bliss.Alice cooper hit me on the scone with his whip as I sang my ravaged lungs out with him and a couple of thousand other fans front row at the Ent cent,it was like a rock Knighting!!! [ Arise! I dub thee Lady Michele of sonic!] Primus nearly put me in traction, I broke my toe and caught headlice at Anthrax and Slayer have now re-arranged My mottled DNA 5 beautiful times. I have seen it inside and out. It is the one truth that I have been given.

Dont think that I am not aware….File it under Hyper.

Truth. In a world of airbrushed pussy and anorxia. It is a truth. And if she? The Siren calls you? In all of her guises and discuises? In her COF teeshirt and smudgy doe eyes,In her Bling and timberlands,In her hippy dreads and her guitar,Kinderwhore,leatherpants,feather boa,glamslam-thrash-hip-hop-jungle-pop….? Take her hand and take the chance. There may be one night,one song,one show ONE SPLIT FUCKING SECOND that will change the way you look at everything forever…. so jump on in the water is fine!

YOU HAVE NOTHING TO LOSE.
That in itsself should be all you need to hear I could sit here and quote the greats all night. If you are gonna ride this train? Go all the way and all you have to worry about…… Let Me try that again…..Dont. Just be the best version of yourself that you can be.

In the name of The Rhumba, The cha-cha and the Mambo. Amen.
Phew!

So! Playing away and working hard. I think that its about T-15 weeks untill we throw ourselves at the rest of the world to show ’em how its done. Alot of people are behind us and the show of good faith that has been hammering my inbox [oh-er!missus!] From all of you Sikfuks around the world and has been staggering. I am here for you so drop me a line. Ya’ll have been there for Me and I like what we have got.

As all the sikfuks are aware ya’ll are gonna be choosing the tracklisting for the new album.I cant wait to hear which ones make the grade with you guys. The title that I keep comming up with is the thing that the B* flung my Way the other night….”Hatebox” She really hit a raw nerve with Me on that and I can see the cover in My head.[“….Blood and lillies….”] I am glad that you dig “Small Enemy” It is fast becoming a real live dinger. I love playing it. Such a grind.

You will be glad to know that Ash has returned to a real Bay area thrash sound with the Tourettes twist! [ Slayer, Vio-lence,Early Metallica….and so on…cooooooool!] that is making push myself to dizzy limits. I have hit A good anger rather than a pointelss madness and that alone is putting me where I need to be.

’bout fuckin’ time too!
Looking forward to seeing ya’ll at the shows.
Stay stong and true.
It will serve you well.
SF4L
Michele.

Courting disaster like a lover at 5:57 am…..

Holy shit! You Sikfuks have got us into the top 8 on The Rock Rage Smackdown! A thousand thanx to you!Keep voting!!!

I Know that Miss Sheila has put the word out there to relate your Tourettes fables for the site so let your fingers do the walking and get to it! She has posed 2 questions in the chatroom but get creative on your bad selves! Tell the world about your 1st show, How you got into the band, Why being a sikfuk means somthing to you. I have all the mail that ya’ll have sent Me over the years and now its time to blurt it out onto the site.

I need to play like a redheaded stepchild needs a slap upside the head. Man! That Energy! To all The Melbourne Crew ….I am not sure what is going on with this next run but I will keep you posted as I am sure Big Mike V will.I just want to head down there again. We have not done Melbourne this year and its pissing me off no end! But it is a vicious circle….old smart arse here is ment to keep writing so we will have more shit to play Ya’ll and all I want to do is play but we need more songs…..
Add lib to fade.
Bit of a fucking bind there. Got good vibes back on the newies that we have been breking out at the last few shows so thats all good.

Dont forget your homework now!

She is breaking her balls on this so do your bit and I will stop sounding like your 7th grade teacher.Deal? Cool!

The only interesting thing I thought of today is that Robert Plant is to the word “Baby” Is what 3 packs a day is to lung cancer….sigh.

For the life of Me I cannot work out why Bloodduster played out in the middle of nowhere as apposed to The Annandale last week end! How the fuck was I gonna get to Carringbah with none of my bandmates around to bribe?
Soooo sad…..

Lordy! that band bring out the shameful lust sodden hell beast in Me!!!. I got told a little while ago that there is some rather shady footage of yours truly making a tool of herself on Matt’s drumriser to “Drink,Fight,fuck” covered in confetti [Thanx Volitile !] and stale beer. I think that Matt was wearing my Cowboy hat at the time…shame…hehehe…..

PC? If you are reading this? WE WANNA PLAY WITH YOU AGAIN!!!!!!Write me buddy!

Gonna try and stay awake and do shit today but as we all know the best laid plans …hold on! Well you know what I mean.Ash sent me some reviews today. All in all some funny shit.Lots of ado about “The strong male vocals” [ Heheheh….] There are Sikfuks worldwide now and I wanna thank all of you for your support,reviews, interviews,emails,posts on the site….it is great. To tell you the truth, I really dig on the people that dont dig it…that right there is the funny shit. I gotta tell you there are some uptight motherfuckers in the world.

Fuel Me darlin’s! C’mon you inarticlate fuckwads gimme more!

Sit at home messing about on your parents computer doing your minimum wage “Do you want fries with that?”
Jobs and take it all out on ME! DO IT!!!!!

Cause no matter how hard you try you will never have the guts to do what I do.
Eat Moi.

I am doing what they never will. I am putting it on the line and Love or hate Me they cant ignore me and seeing that their bovine time is not that precious,I mean ,its not as if people like them DO anything with the time that they are granted on this rock,So I gotta say that it touches Me. I mean it.It truly touches me that these no-hopers write about and to Me.To tell me how much they cant stand Me!!!!

YOU THINK THATS GONNA STOP ME!!!

WOOOHOOO!!!!

Gotcha cunts! Right where I want you.

My ever excellent Sikfuks.You KNOW that its all good. What THEY dont get is that they make US stronger.

As dumb as they are, they are not indeferent…. so boo ya sucks.Round whatever to ME!

Phew! Got a bit het up there for a second! Ergh! I think that I am going through some kind of mental quasi Stevie Nicks dressing thing at the moment. So if you see me in My top hat with the big feather sticking out of the side just dont make any sudden movements and it will be cool. B* was skating [with me pulling her round most of the time ] after we had a most stellar nite on the town when we found a big pile of clothes on the street. Free stuff is good stuff so with a whoop in we dove and she found this MASSIVE white skirt. Some fat chick must have lost a lotta weight and heaved the lot!

So there You have it! But I am still wearing my combat boots!And singing “Edge of 17″….Best fun I have had in ages!

I am not gonna stay awake….fuck it.
What I am gonna do is beat mikey to the rainroom and clean up…and get warm. Fucking Sydney terrace houses!Cold as a witches tit in here!
Later.
SF4L
Michele.

Not as late as you think….

-My life isnt easy baby,but its the life that I NEED.
“Rock and Roll Outlaw” By Rose Tattoo.

-I can resist anything but temptation.
Mae West or Oscar Wilde depending on who you ask.

Bloody hell! Everyone is doing “Boheimain Rhaposdy” Upstairs! I am NOT gonna miss this! back in a sec……

Phew! made it in time for “Thunderbolts and lightening……”Cool.

Just got back from a gossip laden fat assed [ Me not him!] run with my Big brother.[ pant,pant!] He had already been to the gym so therefore had an unfair advantage…Ahhhh! excuses Madden! Well 3kms is a good start. Worst luck for some it did not kill Me.Nor did the cab crash that I was in last night![ No shit!] Gimme danger indeed Mr Pop!

Read this thing about how Mick Jagger would run 12kms a day for weeks before they went out on tour and it got me all riled up. Would rather take the Keith Richards aproach but…Smack and a blood transplant…Hmmm??????? …heheheh….Im kidding!

B* comes up with some dingers. I have these two new songs that I am ment to have done by tommrow right? And as always I have wound myself up so badly that I have left them till the 11th hour. And all I have is scraps and lines that stubournly refuse to join up. Anyway we were up talking this morning trying ,as always to sleep when she…..
“It is your hate box. You keep them all in there…” “What?”
“I dunno” She wantonly exhaled “All your battles…they never stop and that is where you keep them….that is where you hurt the most.’

So, There you have the title of the 1st song that I am gonna write tonite. “Hatebox” Does that fox have My number or what?

I think that we all have them. Hateboxes.I just open mine.Pandora Madden? As Miss Karen would say ” Ner,Ner,Ner….”

It was arond 9 when she decided that I was “Stupidly brillant” And that she was “Brillantly stupid” Or it was the other way around?….cant remember…it was funny as fuck at the time though. She now has the twin tattoos to mine. The wrist ones. I am so touched. It means the world to me. And we can now do that whole “YAH! Supertwins! Sh-ZAM!!!! Gimme the form of an icebucket!’ and so on.

I then laid my theory on her that if tombstones were written like school reports mine would say..
“Does not play well with others.”

And that it is entiely possible that Nutella is packaged angel shit….Its like living with the caterpiller from Alice in Wonderland…She exhaled a lung fulla Byrons Bays finest and arched her eyebrow at that one as I spluttered away…

Had a letter from a friend today that informed me that his life was turning “Into a Gerry Springer show” and all I could think was “Cool! Hillybilly one legged Mexican trassexual midgets having sex with married men!” After I lost that visual and calmed down a bit [I am prone to small bouts of overexitment when it comes to stupid shit ] I related my own Springer-esque fables back,wihed him well on his journey [ Its all these fucking kung foo movies man! They are seeping into my flow here!] and signed off.He is doing a Gretta Garbo and I for one dont blame him a fuckin’ BIT!

As Axl.W.Rose so brillantly croomed to our hair metal ears in the 11:13 sec min EPIC that IS “November Rain.” [This just keeps on popping up dont it now?]

-Dont ya need sometime on your own?…mmmmmmm!!!! everybody needs sometime all alone…..[Cue great big ass kicking guitar solo!]

I think that there is somthing in that for all of us dont you Class? [“Yes Miss Madden”]

I mean, shit is crazy out there and you get so used to it being all fucked up that you get numb to it untill you walk away.Then when you see it for what it is you NEVER want to come back….and therein lies the challenge.
Bugger.

Now I got Little Stevie Winwood in my head “Keep on runnin’….” Great bassline and fuzz tone guitar on that track.Set myself off before to the Allman Bros 22 min live, at the bloody fillmore no less! version of “Whipping post”…Oh Shit! I feel a Led Zeplin attack comming on. “Thank You” was playing when I was in that crash last night.
Spooky.

Gonna go wash my stinky olde dreads which are gonna take eons to dry. But it has been a few months so…..

So I got the debt collectors on my tail and nobody loves me. Country and western at its finest!Soooo band meeting tommrow…Erm? The dog ate my home work. Nah. it will be cool. I know that we have a show comming up ’cause the screenprint thingo was missing from the downstairs shitter.That also means that Delux was here while we were sleeping which is always a bit suspect…I always expect to wake suddenly to him grinning manically holding a pillow scant inches from my face before smothering me. But apon reflection I could insert the name of almost anyone I kmow in that senario……

B* Is watching kung foo movies and this old Sam Elliot wanna-be here is calm.[ Gotta LOVE the “Sam”….sigh…] Not happy. Calm. Why? Cause I am in the eye of a shitstorm. I am like one of those psyhco Vets who try and kill the recruiting CO when they get turned down for their 5th tour. Gotta be where the tracers are flying bay-bee!

Chris Bailey of The Saints said once when asked if he was a songwriter that”…I am just a guy that songs vist from time to time.” And then fell over cause he was so drunk.Definatly an early influence! I like that. If I see the muse lurking I got the duct tape ready..[ Picture Michael Masden in the ear cutting scene from Resoivor Dogs ‘cept for having a pig tied to the chair I got some broad in a floaty dress shitting herself…cool huh?…or is that just Me?]..she seems to follow Blackie soooooo luck be a lady tonite she should be lingering round the bathroom…..He is gonna be mastering the new Nunchucka this week and I cant wait to hear it.22 minuite songs !!!Bless him!

Talking of passion B* once told a dude called Hugh never to darken her door step again after saying that he did not like Bauhaus. I once got into a brawl over the cough at the beginning of “Sweetleaf” [ It was Tony by the way….]

Reading back over all this I realise that we should all be committed.Aw! Fuck it.At least I have never waivered in my beyond idiotic love of all that is sonic and same goes for the people around me.

I better get gone and do shit.
Thanx for tuning in and all that…
Happy trails Sikfuks and I will catch you in the pit.
SF4L
Michele.

Feeling good is good enough.

Platoon.

-Is that all ya got? Is that the best you can do?
N.O.L.A
Tourettes 04′

If I drank [ Count your ass lucky that I am now as dry as the desert…] I would charge my glass [Jug?…neh…Bucket!] to Hubert Selby Jr who I consider to be one of the greatest writers of the last bazillion years. He brought the farm in LA a few days ago.Fuckin’lung cancer…. The man wrote “Requiem for a dream” for Christs sake! ” Last Exit to Brooklyn” as well….
Get them.
Read them.
The man was a God.
I hope that you are smoking your talented ass off where ever you are tonite. Rest in peace.

OK. So here I am in a bad mood again. Listening to Buddy Guy. So at least that is one cool thing.Hubert!!!! Fuck!!!! Kill a talent like that and let the plebs live. Said it before say it again. No God. Unfair.

Question of the day…….
What do you do when you dont even like the people that you thought that you loved? Where the fuck does THAT leave you….

As is now known I went up the river for a few days.I am trying to remember why I came back at all is as shit as I left it. Not that I expected anything else.Woulda been a nice suprise.The shock would have also killed Me. The way that I feel right now? Not even interesting enough to be Kurtz….at least he had the balls to go out for The airbourne and He was 38 at the time { Note to self: You know far too much about that film…] I digress…I am the snail who crawled on the edge of the straight razor and lived.

OK. So I end up in the middle of nowhere. I wrote alot and thought too much. It was cold and I counted as many of the stars as I could. Wished that I still smoked.Nature is pretty crap.I dont get camping…Its like a kick up the ass of a million years of evolution. I pay rent! I would have stayed home but I hate it there too….. Thought about the war that wont stop inside me or out side for that matter.And of how to rob a bank.Spun in circles..fell over…..wrote some more…….all the cool shit that ya get up to when you cut yourself some slack…. Had a good laugh when I remembererd how the last person who well meaningly told me to “Lighten up!” Ended up with my fist in their face.

Went to the Marquee club to catch the AW boys on the weekend. Rock fuckin’ solid. Cool fuckin’ venue as well! Good to see alot of the Sikfuks out in force. We are gonna tear it up on the 22nd with those boys….always a pleasure.

I just need to play again,Thats my problem. I would hate to be in a band with me [I can picture my boys reading this going “Well! She hit the nail on the head with that one!” ] I want to play those huge shows that go for hours. [ Too many years of Zepplin dreams…..] Yeah, I know…thats why I gotta write more stuff, I just cant write about crap that dont matter to me thats all. And Ash is prone to chuck most of My stuff so you get a bit headshy about sticking your neck out. Its worth it though when I stop and I hear ya’ll singing back to Us.Fuck I love that.

That is what it will always come back to for Me.Live barefoot in a dive bay-bee! Damn I love this shit! Blues dudes always ask “Somebody better come help me!” before they peal into a bullshit solo!!!! LOVE IT!!! You dont need no help!!! You are the man!
pant-pant……

The B* has just come down for a ciggerette so my mind is wandering a bit. Oh, and to tell me for the millionth time today that “……it is freezing.!!!!!” She would wear ugg boots in Jamaica. I shit you not.I am convinced that all the people that I know have been sent to drive me mad. I had really solid intentions for this rant but seeing as I am so tired it is all turning to shit before Me.

As perverse as it sounds I am enjoying, on a daily basis, watching what little faith I had left disolve. I hate “Paper cut pain” I want the big hurt or fuck off with your bad self!

I recently found out that Saint Tina reads this shit. Poor woman. Would you wish such a heinious child apon anyone?
I would and the list is Long…….

Thanx for all the mail that ya’ll have been slinging my way .I dedicate this next album to you. Ash is writing the most amazing stuff and I, again, am wallowing in dreck. We Record on Friday so we shall see what we see…

On a different note one of my favorate daily corrispondants has stopped writing Me. If he is reading this I hope that he is well and all is ok.I miss your wit and banter my stoner friend….Tear yourself away from the bong and write me.

The house is gonna wake up soon and I dont wanna see anyone so dont get none on ya and I will catch you when I can get it a bit more sorted in this addled head of mine. SF4L
Michele.

11/5/04-When it comes to being lucky she’s cursed…..
“First cut is the deepest”If I ever live in a share house again I invite you all to the scattering of my ashes.This blows dogs. I am going to order a tee-pee with a killer soundsystem and fuck off for good.Come back to do albums and shit but out side of that I am gonna get all zen on my bad self and live with out human contact. Everyone is driving me mad and they pretend not to speak english every time the phone gets cut off or white goods explode.I am always right.

The only laugh I am getting is evesdropping on the chatroom and watching you all have a go at each other! Fuck you crack me up!

Miss Sheila is slaving away on the SF site and from what I have seen it is all good. Delux and his shady cronies are updating the site in general soooo we shall see what we shall see..

I am in a cunt of a mood and all the light bulbs in the house are blowing up. It tis’ no wonder that I am totally insane.

Everyone in this house is insane, Not just me and if these wall could talk they would get sued by many rock types.
Trust Me on that one. Gossip TOO wrong even for my tender ears!

Fuck this.
Fuck it all .
I will write more when I have somthing to say which will be at some dumb assed hour of the morning.
Till next we meet….round 3am suit ya?
SF4L
Lt Madden